“Less than 2 years prior”, we were in a hospital room with our 4-month-old baby boy, while grasping the hand of a woman who was delivering another baby boy, whom we would also name our son.” We were taken by surprise as we received 2 baby boys, born just 4 months apart, and felt truly fortunate to witness their arrival into the world. We feel very thankful to sustain transparent adoptions with all of our birth families and stay in touch with them frequently.
Last year, Sean, the biological brother of our youngest child, expressed a desire to visit us for 10 days. What began as 10 days extended throughout the entire summer. At summer’s end, he made the decision to audition for the football team. and requested his mom to let him stay with us for the school year! His mother agreed if that was truly what he wanted to pursue. Following a 7-month stay with us, he reestablished contact with his biological father and moved in with him this January. We continue to chat, message, and FaceTime every few weeks. , and we adore him greatly! He even intends to come see us again next summer.
As we adjusted to life at home with our four kids and a hectic routine, we consistently felt the desire to include another child in our family of six (we have four boys and have always wished for a girl). We were aware that at some point this coming year, we would begin the adoption process again in hopes of expanding the Oram family by one more. We maintain consistent communication with our birth moms since they feel like family to us. However, a week ago, we got a message that was unlike any we had received previously.
Ellis’ biological mother has been a single parent for nearly 15 years and has endured more than many can fathom. With no assistance or relatives close by, she has cared for her children and consistently prioritized them above all else. However, this time it was she who required assistance.
She had skipped work several times due to inconsistent childcare and was reluctant to leave her 5-year-old at just any stranger’s home. With much consideration and affection, she inquired if we could care for her baby girl temporarily, allowing her the chance to regain stability and create a better life for herself and her children. We got that message at 6 a.m. on Tuesday morning last week. By 8 a.m., my spouse and I had secured a one-way ticket for her daughter to take her inaugural flight to Utah. However, this was not merely an ordinary flight.
My dad, who travels for work training just once a year, happened to be flying to St. Louis this week and would be only 10 minutes away from their home.
On Thursday night, my father ordered an Uber to their apartment and knocked on the door. He had never encountered our son’s birth mother or his siblings, still, he was greeted warmly with a loving embrace. They called us on FaceTime while they were together to inform us that they were heading to the airport. Here they are. My 61-year-old dad journeying across the nation with a delightfully cheerful and talkative little girl who had just turned 5. While on her first flight. This marked her first trip away from St. Louis.
We remained awake because their flight was delayed, and they finally arrived at our door at 2 a.m. With grins on our faces and arms stretched wide, we embraced our youngest son Ellis’ biological sister, Skylar, into our home. I think he knew she was there. For a child who values his sleep, he stirred awake just seconds after she arrived at our home. In the darkest hours of the night. Skylar had not encountered him in person (they had video-called and shared pictures) since we left the hospital with him 20 months prior. The moment they saw each other, they embraced with a heartwarming hug. They just comprehended. Comprehended their fondness for each other. And the connection they shared. In the three days since she came to our house, we have all come to adore her.
She has won our hearts and brought a distinctive light that makes us smile. In a world largely ruled by boys, we rarely came across the domain of ribbons and curls, fluffy pink unicorns, and everything glittery designed for cute little girls (she still refuses to accept that black is my favorite color and that I own no pink clothing).
We are unsure about how much longer she will stay with us. Due to the uncertain duration of time. Nonetheless, she is a member of the family. We would do whatever it takes for her, her mom, and our son’s biological siblings. We hold them in high regard. We are sincerely thankful for the opportunity our son has to spend time with his older sister during this period. The future remains unknown to us. Throughout this period, we will treasure this lovely little girl and welcome her into our family as one of our own.
We still FaceTime her mom every day and are glad she can use this time to improve her life for herself and her children. I understand that seeking help from someone is not easy. Particularly when it seems you’ve run out of all your alternatives. However, this is the reason we feel so thankful for open adoption.
