I met my upcoming husband, Stuart, when I was 19. He asked me what I required out of life fifteen minutes into our first date. I expressed him that if I ever had broods, I would foster them, but I wasn’t sure about a vocation yet.
Courtesy Sara Cozad
A few years later, we were wedded, and two weeks after our celebratory, we enrolled in foster parent teaching. We believed that we would only take babies or toddlers for temporary reverse care at the time, and I was only 23. That rapidly changed. We revered our first placement, which was a baby for a week. Then there was a call concerning a weekend with a 3-year-old. Weeks, months, and years approved after that weekend. He became Michael, our son.
Photo Credit: Krista Welch
We met Michael’s older brother, Dayshawn, when we oversaw a sibling visit a few months later. Michael ran across the playground and jumped into his arms as soon as he saw him. After exchanging glances, Stuart and I realized they had to be together.
Photo Credit: Krista Welch
I was anxious at first. Dayshawn was just 13 years younger than me, almost a teenager. However, my worries disappeared as soon as I spoke with him. He defies all preconceived notions about adolescents in care and is funny, kind, and sympathetic. He even interrupted the judge on the day of our adoption to give an explanation of his adoption goals. Everyone started crying.
Photo Credit: Krista Welch
Our intention when we became foster parents was not to adopt. Our goal was to assist children and families. Yes, it is devastating when the 14 children we have fostered leave. Reunification, however, can also be lovely. Witnessing families put in a lot of effort and come together has been one of the most poignant experiences. Many of them remain close to us today.
Photo Credit: Krista Welch
The most difficult aspect of our sons’ case was the emotional back and forth as they spent years alternating between adoption and reunification. I learned to just be present and to give up trying to control everything.
Photo Credit: Krista Welch
We have changed our focus since adopting. Teens who are frequently disregarded, such as LGBTQ+ youth, teen mothers, or trafficking survivors, are the kind of teens we want to foster. It’s been a pleasure since we recently welcomed a 14-year-old.
Photo Credit: Krista Welch
Foster care is difficult. There are many highs and lows in it. However, I wouldn’t trade any of the fourteen times I’ve loved. I was destined for this life.
