Skip to Content

I like my tics, and I don’t want them to go away. Mom shares son’s Tourette journey of self-advocacy

I like my tics, and I don’t want them to go away. Mom shares son’s Tourette journey of self-advocacy

I fantasized of becoming a mother since I was little. My heart flooded with joy when my husband Leroy and I exposed we were pregnant our first child, Willow. My spirits were a mixture of enthusiasm and anxiety. Upon her influx, she was perfect and motherhood distorted into the most delightful gift I could have received. A short time later, when Willow was only 7 months old, we exposed I was pregnant again, this time with our son, Knox.

Courtesy of Tawnee Pickar



With a baby and a toddler, life soon twisted hectic and rather chaotic. However, we were thankful. We had a ridge over our heads and our children were healthy. Life was feeling good.

Courtesy of Tawnee Pickar

Knox industrialized as expected until he reached an age of approximately 18 months. At that point, things altered. The words he had only just begun to shape slipped away.

Courtesy of Tawnee Pickar

He became progressively isolated, at times receding to corners when guests arrived. His growth of fine motor skills was also late. We took him to his doctor, as we were worried. She suspected the presence of autism and decided for an valuation. Knox received a diagnosis of moderate nonverbal autism at the age of two and a half.

Courtesy of Tawnee Pickar


The diagnosis included a list of treatments speech, work related, preschool, and play therapy. We undertook all of them, with the hope of easing Knox’s life. Those years were among the roughest. He normally exploded in annoyance drumming, jolting, pulling hair, and yelling. Between the ages of two and four, life was exhausting.

Courtesy of Tawnee Pickar

Three weeks after Knox’s fifth birthday, new indications arose. His eyes moved involuntarily, and he blinked a lot. There were eras when he appeared to gaze into the void, as if inaccessible. He struck and injured his brow until it bled. Out of fear of appropriations, we hurried him to the emergency room. Doctors started it as tics related with autism.

Courtesy of Tawnee Pickar

After several months, and still not settled, we looked for another view. Ultimately, a neurologist proposed that Knox could have Tourette Syndrome, although the diagnosis required at least two motor tics and one vocal tic over the course of a year.

Courtesy of Tawnee Pickar



An EEG showed abnormal brain waves, and a following MRI revealed a Chiari malformation. Knox had brain operation in New York during the Covid pandemic in 2019. The period took a toll on him expressively, but after he healthier, we witnessed genuine developments

Courtesy of Tawnee Pickar

Knox conventional a formal diagnosis of Tourette Syndrome around the same time. His tics industrialized over the years. Initially, they were modest. However, by the time he turned eight, his whole body was wedged every day. His head broke back and forth, his abdominal muscles tautened until he felt nauseous, his fingers curled up in pain, and he kept jumping. He showed vocal tics such as throat clearing, sudden outpourings, and imprecation (known as coprolalia, which occurs in only 10–15% of persons with Tourette’s).

It has been problematic to explain this disorder to other people. At times, people who don’t know him misconstrue his behavior as impoliteness. He once incorrectly referred to a woman by name while in a shop. Another time, he yelled “chubby” at a passerby. He always offers an immediate apology, but that doesn’t lessen moments like that

Knox has established extraordinary resilience in spite of the challenges. As time has approved, he has come to understand his condition and is starting to advocate for himself. Even though his tics are erratic and frequently misjudged, he opposes each day courageously.

Our family has faced tests during this trip, but it has also been noticeable by growth, community, and deep love. Tourette Syndrome includes far more than what people believe they comprehend. Knox is not defined by his analysis he is a loving, cheerful, and strong boy who teaches us about endurance, persistence, and acceptance.

Another difficulty is instinct control. Knox acts on his thoughts without delay grabbing sharp items, inaugural car doors, or vaulting from surfaces. To ensure his safety, we continue in a state of constant watchfulness.