When I was little, I was full of joy. I played soccer, watched cartoons, and felt completely happy. Growing up, I started feeling the need to do everything just right. I spent late nights studying and stressing over grades. I thought life was hard because of school, but I didn’t realize how lucky I was. I thanked them, but deep down, I didn’t really feel it. I never really thanked God for the good things in my life.
Then everything changed. I got sick.
Not just a cold or the flu, this was much worse. I ended up in a hospital bed with IVs in my arms, full of painkillers. One day I felt fine, the next I could barely move. I was going to the bathroom up to 30 times a day. After tests, I was told I had severe Ulcerative Colitis. My own body was attacking my colon.
Doctors put me on high-dose steroids. My face got puffy, I lost weight, and I couldn’t sleep. Nothing was helping. I spent more time in the hospital than at home that summer. I had blood transfusions, iron infusions, and started a strong medication called Remicade. It helped my intestines, but it made me weak and sick in other ways.
Just when I started to feel a little better, I got hit again. I was diagnosed with C. diff, a terrible stomach infection. It destroyed what was left of my colon. My medicine stopped working, and I could hear the doctors getting worried. They didn’t know what to do next.
Soon, I was too weak to eat or drink. I was fed through a tube. I felt like I was fading. One day, a surgeon in dark blue scrubs walked in. He said my colon needed to be removed right away. If it didn’t get treated, it might rupture and end my life. I was only 16 and terrified, but I understood there was no other option.
When I woke up after surgery, I felt like I could breathe again. I had a bag on my stomach now, an ostomy. At first, I was afraid of it. But it saved my life. Slowly, I got stronger. I could walk, eat, and live again.
Since then, I’ve had 8 surgeries. I tried reversing the ostomy, but it didn’t work. Still, this little bag gave me back my life. I go to school, work, and spend time with friends. Some days are hard. People may judge. But I’m alive.
And for that, I’m thankful.
