In 2020, I made a promise to myself. I wanted to be more open, brave, and fun. I was tired of getting anxious when I was around others. I was tired of being shy and scared. So, I made a goal to face my fear of social situations.
One of the things I planned was to visit a local brewery I had never been to. It took me weeks to build up the courage. On the last Friday of the month, I almost stayed home. But I pushed myself and went. I grabbed the last available spot at the counter, and that’s when I first crossed paths with Tim.
Tim was kind and real. We both loved nature. He was building his own camper van, and I had always dreamed of traveling and camping with someone. From that night on, we started going on little adventures in his van, which he named Brutis. We went to lakes, campsites, and even when everything closed during the pandemic, we found quiet places to go and enjoy life.
Tim told me about his two kids, Bowen and Brooklyn, the night we met. Being with someone who already had kids was something new for me. I was nervous, but excited. We waited a while before I met them, which gave Tim and me time to grow strong as a couple.
When I did meet the kids, we kept it simple. We met at a park where they were camping. Brooklyn liked me right away. She was only four. Bowen, who was eight, was more careful. He asked me questions, like what I did for work. By the end of the night, he gave me a high five. That night felt perfect.
After that, I started seeing the kids at parks or campgrounds. We played a lot. I would push Brooklyn on swings, go down slides with Bowen, play games in the van, and just be present. One special memory was when we stayed at a hotel with a pool and jacuzzi. Brooklyn was scared to go in, but I held her hands and helped her. She turned to me and quietly asked, ‘Don’t let anything happen to me.’ That moment is forever etched in my memory.
The kids also saw how I treated their dad. Whenever Tim and I share a kiss, Bowen grins and says, “I saw that!” Brooklyn bursts out laughing and yells, “Kissing!” They light up when they see us enjoying each other.
As time passed, my bond with the kids grew stronger. Bowen now talks to me about everything. Brooklyn once asked me to help her with bath time instead of her dad. That made me feel so special.
If I’ve learned anything, it’s this: don’t try to be a parent right away. Let the biological parent take the lead. Be there to love, play, and support. Learn what makes each child feel loved. Brooklyn loves hugs. Bowen loves hearing kind words. I work hard to make sure each of them feels cared for in their own way.
Becoming a stepmom has been a huge blessing. I’m grateful for the love they’ve shown me. Facing my fear in 2020 led me to this beautiful life one filled with love, adventure, and the chance to become a mom in the most unexpected way.
