I met Carl on a blind date in January 2001, just a few days after I turned 23. At that time, I wasn’t particularly interested in dating, let alone starting something serious. I had recently ended a relationship and was still carrying some bitterness from it. All I knew about Carl beforehand was that he was two years younger than me, which didn’t help my skepticism.
He wasn’t thrilled about being set up either, so when we went out bowling with his sister and brother-in-law, neither of us was in the mood to impress. Oddly enough, that was what made the night unforgettable. We laughed freely, relaxed into being ourselves, and discovered a surprising comfort in each other’s company.
What started as an unpromising evening quickly turned into something life-changing. Just two and a half months later, Carl proposed, and a couple of months after that, we got married. In just five months, we had gone from strangers to husband and wife. At the time, I was in nursing school, juggling work and classes, while Carl was still figuring out his career path. Despite our busy schedules, we managed to plan a wedding, and I felt like I had married the man I had always dreamed of.
From a young age, I had longed to be a mother. I imagined a house filled with children—sometimes even picturing as many as twenty running around. Carl’s vision was more practical; he thought three children would be ideal. Early in our marriage, I asked him if adoption was something he would ever consider. He was open to it but wanted to try for biological children first. Four years into our marriage, when Carl had advanced further in his education, we decided it was time to start our family. While I worked as a pediatric nurse caring for other people’s children, I dreamed of having my own, though a quiet fear lingered that it might not come easily for me.
Sadly, my gut was right. After almost a year of trying and getting nowhere, I realized something wasn’t right. Tests and procedures followed, and eventually we were told the words I had dreaded most: we would not be able to have children biologically. I was devastated, but I also knew adoption had always been in my heart. After grieving, Carl and I agreed to begin the adoption process.
The journey wasn’t easy. Endless paperwork, interviews, and background checks became my “paper pregnancy.” If I wasn’t going to experience morning sickness or swollen ankles, I would endure the emotional toll of waiting. After almost nine months of waiting, our opportunity finally arrivedThrough an online adoption site, we connected with a young girl who was just fifteen and due to give birth in a week. Meeting her and her family felt like stepping into something divinely arranged. The connection was immediate and heartfelt. She chose us, and soon after, I stood by her side in the delivery room. When our daughter was born, I felt an overwhelming mix of love and gratitude. Becoming her mom felt like a true miracle.
Two years later, we began the process again, this time hoping to give our daughter a sibling. After some time, we were chosen by another expectant mother who lived in Colorado. Despite the twists and turns of moving states and then returning home to Idaho, everything lined up, and we welcomed a son into our family. His birth mother wanted an open adoption, and the months we shared leading up to his birth created a bond I will always cherish. Today, we still share a meaningful relationship with her, and our children have grown up knowing they are deeply loved by many.
Years later, our path to adoption took us in an unexpected direction. Through a family connection, we learned about a young girl living in an orphanage in Ecuador. The process was long, complicated, and emotionally draining, but we felt strongly that she belonged in our family. After two years of paperwork and waiting, we traveled to bring her home. At twelve years old, she became our daughter, and although her adoption looked different from the others, it was no less perfect. She brought a new kind of strength and love into our family.
Looking back now, I see that our journey to parenthood has been filled with twists, setbacks, and miracles. Adoption taught us patience, vulnerability, and above all, the power of unconditional love. Our family may not look the way I imagined when I was young, but it is more beautiful than I ever could have planned. Each of our children found their way to us in unique ways, and together we’ve built a family rooted in love, resilience, and faith.
