We always knew that carrying a child would not be safe for my health. Because of that, my husband Max and I had many conversations about other ways to grow our family. Adoption was the option that kept coming back to us. In January 2021, we officially signed a contract with a company called Angel Adoption. We hoped that by the end of the following year we might be holding our first child. What we didn’t expect was how quickly our journey would move, or how many ups and downs we would face.
Soon after joining Angel’s program, we received the call we had been waiting for. Our profile had been chosen by an expectant mother. In fact, four families were chosen, and we were one of them. We were nervous and unsure what to say, but after talking with our coordinator and reading through the resources she sent, we felt calmer. The expectant mother preferred to communicate by text, and though her replies came slowly, we started building a small connection with her.
Then, all of a sudden, the texts stopped. We went two months without hearing from her. Angel told us it was best to close the opportunity but reminded us that if she ever reached out again, we could pick up where we left off. Max and I tried to prepare our hearts, telling ourselves this wasn’t going to work out.
Still, as her due date got closer, we couldn’t help but think about her and the baby. Then one evening, as we were watching a movie, my phone rang. It was her. My heart raced. We had never spoken on the phone before, but the conversation felt surprisingly natural. She explained that she hadn’t made a final choice yet but wanted to meet us in person. Without hesitation, we packed our bags and drove to Arkansas.
Meeting her in person felt so important. We shared a meal together, and the conversation flowed easily. The next day, we even had breakfast at her mother’s house, where we were welcomed warmly. After that weekend, she called Angel and officially chose us as the family for her baby. We were overjoyed. We called our friends and family with the news and started preparing for a September 2021 due date.
But after those first few exciting weeks, the communication faded again. Texts became short and infrequent, and then she disappeared completely. We didn’t know if she was safe, if she had gone to Texas as planned, or if she had changed her mind. On August 17, we received a call from Angel: she had decided not to move forward with adoption. I was at work when I heard the news, and I broke down in tears. I ran to my car and called Max, barely able to get the words out. We had been preparing for this child, and suddenly it was over. That night, I packed away all the baby things we had set up in the nursery.
Just two days later, everything changed again. The baby had been born, and the birth mother wanted to continue with the adoption after all. My head spun with emotion. Without even asking Max, I said yes. We were told there were still challenges, and that nothing was guaranteed, but we knew we had to try
We rushed to Texas, checked into a hotel near the hospital, and waited. The birth mother had medical complications, so we couldn’t meet the baby right away. The following Monday, she was scheduled to sign her rights over, but when we met with her, she seemed unsure again. Hours passed in limbo, with our hearts breaking all over again. Then, suddenly, our attorney called with news: the birth mother had signed, and the baby was ours.
We were overwhelmed. Tears streamed down our faces as we were invited to meet our daughter. Walking into the hospital room was surreal. The birth mother handed me the baby, and Max hugged her. For the first time, I held our daughter, and I cried tears of joy.
We named her Rohen, a name we had loved for years. Out of respect, we also included her birth mother’s chosen name, Hannah, as her middle name. To us, her name represents the love of both families.
Our adoption journey was anything but simple. It was filled with moments of joy, heartbreak, fear, and hope. But through it all, we gained not only a daughter but also a lasting connection with her birth mother. We have an open adoption and share updates and photos with her. When Rohen was six months old, we traveled back to Texas to finalize the adoption and spent time with her birth mom again.
Today, we are grateful every day. Grateful for the process, for the strength we found in ourselves, for the love of our families, and most of all, for the gift of Rohen. She is the child we were meant to have, and her story will always be one of resilience, love, and grace.
