Becky penned down a heartfelt note for the people who have their loved ones, especially parents, diagnosed with dementia. Becky stated that these people are the real heroes, the ones who win every day and decide to go through so much heartbreak. Not just this, she had no idea what spending life around someone diagnosed with dementia looked like until she experienced it herself. Ann, her mother’s younger sister, was there with her family to spend summers with her loved ones.
She left on Sunday, and Becky recalls being in utter shock when her dad called her early on Monday morning. It was 6:15 am when she could hardly open her eyes, and the moment she heard her dad say how her mother’s arms were constantly shaking since 3 am. It had been three hours, but just out of love, to not disturb Becky, Dad did not call at first, and was going through it alone. Becky rushed, putting everything she could find at the moment, and the next six hours were spent in the ER. Although her mother’s condition got better, the doctors could not give a proper diagnosis, and they were sent home with a mind full of questions.
Becky settled her parents, did all the chores that needed to be done, arranged the medicines, and then drove home, heartbroken and exhausted. How could she know it was just the beginning?
On the second day, Dad told Becky that an ambulance was needed for Mom so that she could be rushed to the hospital. This was the first time Becky had heard her dad sob. 6:30 am, when Becky reached the hospital, her dad was there, clinging to her, with a fearful face, telling her how he thought he would lose his partner forever. The couple has spent a lifetime making beautiful memories; thus, the moment made her realise how significant Mom’s presence was in his life. The next few hours felt like a nightmare as all they could do was wait for the reports, for the doctors to make a formal diagnosis this time.
Not just this, the morphine further increased the mother’s dementia. Her mother was moving everything in her reach inside the house, only an inch or two, and thought she was rearranging stuff. She looked happy after a long while, enough to satisfy Dad and Becky. On the third day, Dad again called, telling Becky he was dizzy. In the past few days, Becky had already had so much that she lost track of time; thus, after the call, she knew it was time to race back. Dad sat on his recliner when she reached, whereas mother was in her wheelchair. She was waiting for a bath.
Noticing how things had changed so much, Becky accepted that things and life would now be different for her, and she had no other option but to go with the flow. The caretakers, Carl and Mary Jane, were called to take care of the parents, and they arrived by 2:00 p.m. to ease the load Becky alone was carrying on her shoulders. Looking at them, Becky finally felt relief, like things would get easier for them, so she now wanted to shower to let it all out. She hugged her mother and kissed her dad before heading for a shower.
Becky penned down her story, and the emotions she felt when, for the first time in decades, she was her parents struggling physically. Life is all about heartbreaks, but keeping yourself together when you encounter them, as you must figure out ways to carry the load at the end of the day. Not just this, but do not forget to give all the love you can to your parents, as they will not be able to stick through your entire journey. The journey of life!
