When my daughter was in kindergarten, there was a boy named DJ in her class. They weren’t close friends, just familiar faces to each other. Over the course of that year, my daughter’s mom and I met a lot of other parents, and at one point we met DJ’s parents Dan and Debra. Debra was warm and friendly, and Dan seemed kind but quiet.
While I was seated at Denny’s, savoring my breakfast and browsing through the newspaper, I spotted Dan and Debra in the booth beside me. Dan identified me by the Cubs and Bears stickers on my truck and began chatting. We instantly connected through our shared love for Chicago sports, and at that moment, I realized a friendship was starting.
Later that year, Dan invited me to join his fantasy baseball league. I jumped at the chance, paid the $40 entry fee and he emailed me my team after I missed the draft. He even gave me tips on up and coming Cubs players. I loved being part of it but toward the end of the season, communication stoppedI wasn’t anxious about the money or even having the edge perhaps just a bit! but I was worried that something was off. I didn’t pursue it back then, however.
Several years later, Dan and Debra relocated beyond the school district and I thought I wouldn’t be in contact with them anymore. Suddenly, Dan sent me a message on Facebook requesting my phone number. He called because he was facing a challenging period and required someone to converse with We spoke for a long time that day. I remember telling him how much I admired his family and how lucky he was to have Debra and their kids. At the time, my relationship wasn’t going well, and I only had my one child.
Over the years, I kept in touch with Dan intermittently. He seemed to be doing better and even shared news about a new home for his family. Meanwhile, both our children had grown my daughter and his son were entering middle schoolI hadn’t seen his child since first grade but I kept encountering Dan at school Daddy/Daughter dances. He consistently exuded pride and happiness for his daughters.
After the pandemic, the local Park District reopened their all-ages Daddy/Daughter dances. My daughter and I attended, and there was Dan, showing off his Cubs tattoo to match the Bears tattoo I’d recently gotten. It was a wonderful night seeing him so happy with his girls. But a month later, his wife posted that Dan had passed away suddenly. He was so young, and I was heartbroken.
Fast forward to February 2022. My daughter and I were in line for the Daddy/Daughter dance and I commented on how sad it was that we wouldn’t see Dan and his girls. During the dance, I noticed a tall teenage boy there too young to be a dad but older than I expected. Later, I realized from his mother’s Facebook post that this boy was DJ, coming to the dance to bring his sisters because their father had passed.
Witnessing DJ that evening brought me feelings of both pride and sorrow. The small child from preschool had matured into a young adult who is passionate about his family. Dan raised an exceptional son and I found myself wanting to be a father with that same love and strength.
