Life is tough when you grow up in an environment of chaos, disappointments, and fear of abandonment. Similar was the case of Jaymie Gerena, who spent her childhood in Connecticut, but she had parents; however, they were drug addicts. What made the situation even worse was how they were involved in gangs. Thus, despite living in a place she called ‘home’, Jaymiee could never express her emotions for fear of being called weak. She knew her feelings would not get acknowledged.
She still recalls how, despite being a child, because her mother had once slipped into a heroin high, she had to wipe up all the blood from her mother’s arm. Imagine, rather than having memories with friends, and full of joy, all you can recall is this! The pain doesn’t end here. From being molested to enduring physical abuse, just when she entered her teenage years, her life was a complete mess, leaving behind emotional scars that will probably never let her heal from all these traumas. Right before her eyes, her father lost to life when she was 18. It happened because of drug abuse, and a month after his death, his mother was ready to leave for California.
Her mother thought the fresh start would make things easier on her, so she did not wait to heal; instead, she chose to remarry and start a family. One she had always wished for. Since the marriage, things got better for Jaymie; however, the news that a gang murdered her nineteen-year-old brother left the family heartbroken and unable to accept the news. Jaymie was equally hurt; however, the way she was brought up, she opted to endure the pain silently. Burying her emotions and not speaking up was the only way she had learned to go through grief, and so, by now, she was a pro at pretending to be okay, no matter how much she suffered internally.
As time passed, she felt unworthy of love and felt like she had no bonds she could treasure, which made her eventually fall into depression, a life full of suffering. Fast forward, a few years later, Jaymie, with all the emotional pain buried deep inside her, was a mother of two baby girls. Despite trying to fix things, she failed to provide them with a good lifestyle. She changed her environment, marriage, and every external thing that would bother her, yet she failed as the thoughts of ending her life kept coming back.
While on a night when she was sitting alone, all the memories from her past hit her, and she sat on the floor sobbing in emotional pain, begging for something good to come her way. In the next few minutes, Jaymie opened Google and searched for ways to stay happy. This was when she found the gems of Tony Robbins, someone who writes about trauma and healing journeys. Whenever she read a piece he wrote, she was obsessed with how good it was and how powerful her mind was.
The quote ‘If you can’t find the light, be it’ changed Jaymie’s perspective on life. Not just this, it was clear how what she read significantly impacted her, as in the next three months Jaymie had already given 16 books a read, and she put it all into practice for her personal growth. Her transformation was remarkable when she prioritized herself as she understood that if she wanted her family to be content, she had to heal internally.
From only having $48 in her wallet to now running a business, Jaymie’s journey was tiring but one that she will forever be proud of. The girl who was obsessed with reading content Tony Robbins wrote is now working alongside him. Is it not what is called success? Now a mother of three, Jaymie is thriving and helps others heal from their traumas. How she began her journey from zero was the best decision ever!
